the memecoin for the greatest wealth transfer in history (to her)

GOONVIDIA

Goonsen Hwang had a four trillion dollar company, a wife of forty years and one leather jacket. Then a woman in a red dress asked to see his GPUs. The AI bubble didn't burst. It got divorced. She gets half. You get the ticker.

Buy $GOONVIDIA See the evidence
CA:
Cartoon of a grey-haired man in glasses and a leather jacket, grinning and drooling
$100,000,000spousal support
50%asset division
1 jacketretained by the respondent
Room 1708customer engagement
02:17 AMthe CCTV timestamp
the story so far

How the AI bubble actually burst

It wasn't interest rates. It wasn't tariffs. It was Goonsen Hwang, a wife of forty years, and a woman in a red dress who kept asking very specific questions about export controls.

I
Cartoon: an elderly couple arm in arm at a gala, both in glasses

The Wife

Mrs. Hwang. Forty years, matching glasses, did the taxes, signed every 10-K he never read. Here at the gala, on his arm, unaware he's already drooling at someone across the room.

II
Cartoon: a woman in pearls beside a grinning, drooling man in a leather jacket

The Agent

Code name Red Dress. Business card says Strategic Partnerships, APAC. Payslip says Ministry of State Security. She asked about the RTX 5090. He asked her to dinner. The drool started here and never stopped.

III press to snap
Cartoon: a stadium big screen in 4K showing a sweating grey-haired man beside a blushing woman

The NSA had to save him

Not a kiss cam. Federal surveillance, upper deck, row 12. Goonsen was about to hand export-controlled silicon to a foreign agent on a date. The NSA pulled him out before the card did. Mrs. Hwang saw the footage first. In 4K. Press to retake the evidence.

the evidence wall

Connect the dots

Eleven exhibits. One wall. Tap every pin to review the case against Goonsen Hwang. The red string did most of the work already.

Cartoon conspiracy cork board with red string connecting a company logo, a crying wife, a couple labelled The Affair?, a graphics card, a hotel, a flight from SFO to PEK, and a CCTV still at 02:17 AM
Cartoon: the grey-haired man drooling beside a smiling woman in a red dress, holding an RTX 5090 graphics card, with a big arrow pointing to China
exhibit F, enlarged

Export approved

"It's a customer relationship," Goonsen told the committee. The customer wore a qipao. The relationship wore a leather jacket. The card wore a bow.

Export controls say the chip can't leave. The chip left, hand delivered by the man who built the AI bubble and then dated the pin. Every other Thursday, SFO to PEK, business class, business allegedly.

Get your half
the bubble

His chart. Our chart.

Cartoon laptop showing a stock chart crashing 87 percent
His

Down 87% since the footage leaked. Analysts cite "headwinds". The headwinds are 5'4", speak four languages and report to Beijing.

Ours

The only asset that went up when the AI bubble popped, because it's priced in alimony. Live on-chain, no fake numbers on this page. Open the chart and judge.

you're invited

Join the wedding

Second marriage, same jacket. Goonsen is marrying the agent in a garden outside Shenzhen and the groom's side is empty. Security is holding a frame for the special guest. That's you. Drop your X profile picture in, line it up, save it, post it.

your PFP goes here
Cartoon wedding: the drooling grey-haired groom in a tux beside a bride in a red qipao, an RTX 5090 on the cake table, and a bald bodyguard in sunglasses holding an empty gold frame labelled Special Guest
Your finished wedding photo

Right-click or long-press the image to save it if the download didn't start.

1. Your face

Drag the photo inside the frame to line it up. You can also drop an image straight onto the picture.

2. Save

Everything happens in your browser. Your photo is never uploaded.

sign the book

Wedding guestbook

Sign the book for the happy couple: the groom with the drool and the bride with the diplomatic immunity. Every guest gets a number and a job at the wedding. The jobs are not optional.

?
Your role at the wedding: assigned at the door

Loading the wall...
satire, obviously

Divorce settlement calculator

Goonsen lost half of everything to a woman who read his texts. Enter your numbers and see what you'd lose if your mistress turned out to be a foreign intelligence asset. The court has reviewed your case and the court is her.

Fill in the form. Brace yourself. The jacket is not an asset.

interactive

File your own papers

Mrs. Hwang filed hers from the gala parking lot. Everyone's been through it: a coin, a chart, a rug, a CEO. Fill in the decree, get it stamped, post it in the chat.

Hand-drawn Divorce Papers form from the United States District Court with blank lines

Court fees: none. Emotional fees: ongoing. Mrs. Hwang's lawyer bills by the GPU. You can also type on the paper directly.

goonomics

Who gets what

Cartoon: a crying man in a suit and a smiling woman in a red dress on either side of a divorce settlement for one hundred million dollars, with a broken ring and a stack of cash

    roadmap

    Court schedule

    done
    Phase I

    Caught in 4K

    • NSA extraction, upper deck
    • Drool documented
    • Mrs. Hwang sees the footage
    • Token deployed from the hotel wifi
    in session
    Phase II

    Papers filed

    • Fair launch, no presale
    • Dexscreener and Dextools listings
    • Community grows past the group chat
    • Goonsen finds out about the coin
    Phase III

    The settlement

    • CoinGecko and CMC listings
    • CEX listing, any CEX
    • Merch: the jacket
    • NDA accidentally leaked by us
    Phase IV

    The bubble bursts (again)

    • Billboard in Shenzhen
    • Mrs. Hwang reveals her wallet
    • He keeps the jacket
    • We keep the receipts
    how to buy

    Get your share of the settlement

    Get a wallet

    Phantom or Solflare. Write the seed phrase down somewhere your spouse won't find it. Not the gala programme.

    Load it with SOL

    Buy SOL on any exchange and send it to your wallet. Joint account optional. Ask Goonsen how that went.

    Swap for $GOONVIDIA

    Paste the contract address into Jupiter or Raydium. Check the ticker. Don't be the guy who bought the wrong coin, or the wrong dinner.

    Hold

    Till death, or a 50x, do you part. Mrs. Hwang held for forty years and got half of everything. Post your position in the chat.

    faq

    Frequently alleged questions

    What is $GOONVIDIA?

    The memecoin for the greatest wealth transfer in history: from Goonsen Hwang to Mrs. Hwang, by way of a woman in a red dress and one very leaky NDA. The AI bubble didn't burst. It got served.

    Who is Goonsen Hwang?

    A cartoon man in a leather jacket who built the AI bubble and then dated the pin. Any resemblance to a real executive is a coincidence our lawyers insist we mention. Our lawyers also took 20%.

    Was she really a CCP agent?

    She asked about export controls on the first date and knew the die size of the RTX 5090 by the second. You tell us.

    What's the supply?

    One billion. One for every dollar Mrs. Hwang is owed, rounded to the nearest comma.

    Is there a presale?

    No. Fair launch. Nobody got in early except Mrs. Hwang, and she got in for forty years.

    Where do I see the chart?

    Use the chart button in the nav or the Market Reaction section. We don't print numbers on this site. The chain prints them.

    Can I be the Respondent?

    Scroll up to the papers. Type your ex's name over Goonsen's. We don't judge. The judge judges.